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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP - DH's salary has increased year over year. We haven't been making this much for the past decade.  We have had 3 kids in daycare from 2015-2021.  That took a HUGE chunk of our money. We also paid off his law school loan aggressively.

I am actually fine with doing 80% of the kid/household things.  Yes sometimes it gets stressful but all in all this is what I am used to so I don't find it overly burdensome.

I just feel bad that my DH is stressed all the time. Big law is feast or famine.  When its busy, work is pouring in. When its slow you are always worried about not making your hours.  So the stress is always present. It never goes away. [/quote]

You have a really good attitude, OP.

My .02 is that the stress is something your DH can work on managing better. I am not suggesting that is easy but I think it could be the best solution for all of the reasons others have cited. There are generally two types of stress in big law. There are the external stressors like being on all the time, billable requirements, demanding clients, deadlines. And then there are internal stressors, which I would suspect are more of a contributor than your DH would readily admit, like perfectionism, feeling responsible for everything, not delegating effectively, difficulting disconnecting from work in his (admittedly limited) downtime, operating at an 11/10 at all times so his nervous system is maxed out when he is done working, unhealthy habits to cope like drinking too much or not sleeping or exercising. The second category is totally within his control. Would he be open to therapy?
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