Reply to I wish I was chill

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[quote=Anonymous]I feel you OP! Also 50 with zero chill.

One thing I am trying to do is carve out more time for total relaxation where I mentally disconnect from all responsibilities and do something restorative. I’m good at doing that for vacations but it is harder to do on a daily basis.

I also think a big dose of acceptance and reframing helps a lot. Acceptance that I will always have no-chill periods. Reframing in that I work on noticing that stress and anxiety come and go, and I am not actually stressed all the time.

One thing that I have been working on for any strong emotion is just letting myself feel it. Often times I discover that there is a *different* feeling underneath it, and in that feeling lies the actual truth. For example my kid is in the middle of high school applications and I got really stressed and upset about potential rejection. So I just let myself feel that for a while and realized that underneath it were two things: enormous, infinite love for my kid; and powerful mama bear energy. Somehow that made the anxiety easier to bear. I would start thinking or worrying about the applications, then I would say “Oh right, I really love Larlo so much! And I’m his mama bear.” Then the discomfort would slip away. [/quote]

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