Reply to Who is stuck in a holiday funk this year?

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[quote=Anonymous]I often have a little bit of conflicted feelings around the holidays because they make me think about my childhood (not good) and my parents/siblings (very dysfunctional, major source of stress and sadness). But my immediate family (DH/DD) is wonderful and we spend Christmas at home just us and really put effort into enjoying it and making it wonderful, so usually all that outweighs those difficult feelings about my family of origin.

I am not sure why, but this year it has been much harder. I think because we saw my family in August (we had not visited in a few years) and I am still dealing with the hangover of that experience. And then we did Thanksgiving with my ILs, who have their own issues, and that wound up also being a very stressful holiday for DH and, by extension, me, and just really brought home the degree to which we have no extended family who are a source of love or comfort.

So I'm really struggling. This afternoon I got a package from my mom, a gift for my DD that is honestly rude and hurtful. I know my mom doesn't mean it to be that, but she cannot help it. I opened it and wound up spending the next hour tearfully talking through my feelings with my DH because it raised all these awful memories from childhood and just made me feel so lonely and abandoned. And I still need to call my mom to let her know the gift arrived and to thank her for sending it, and also figure out how or if I will give it to DD and if there is a way to give to her without it feeling like a bummer.

I am still hopeful that the joy of the holiday and my wonderful spouse and kid will win out, but yes, I'm having a hard time. [/quote]

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