Reply to MIL cuts us off, then demands holiday access. Advice?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Are you inviting her and she’s refusing?  More importantly do your kids invite them and she’s refuses? Do you really want more than birthdays and holidays?

I mean if all the kids know is that they any see granny on birthdays and Christmas and you have dragged them into your drama, I don’t get what’s so bad. That’s all that many kids see their grandparents. [/quote]
Honestly, I don’t mind hosting or visiting when things are “normal”, but they are never normal after she goes off the grid, and I’m tired of her disappearing until she feels the loneliness of holidays without family. You can’t abandon us all year in between birthdays and holidays. Am I crazy to think this isn’t normal? Is it typical for parents/grandparents to cut off all contact between holidays after creating drama or not getting their way?

—OP[/quote]

I don’t think it’s abnormal unless you r she is pulling your kids into drama. Some people are just busy and don’t make the time to get together. My kids have some aunts and uncles that they see once a year. My kids never see relatives for their birthdays. Some years they see their grandmother only at Thanksgiving and at a summer picnic. They just aren’t the people my kids are close with and spend their time with. No drama, just life choices. It doesn’t have to come with negative value judgments.

I will add that we parents see and talk to relatives more frequently but our kids just don’t. [/quote]

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