Reply to ISO coaching advice regarding my 8G girls team

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Its rec soccer. Its for fun. Just let her be the GK and work on shoring up your defense. Who cares if you lose every game? [/quote]

The kids care. Even rec kids want to win and at this age, kids should understand how to behave. [/quote]

OP here. I agree kids care about the outcomes of rec games, which is why I have to think carefully about my decision with respect to this particular player and her role on the team. Until now, I've placed this particular player's personal needs above the team's; however, I'm unsure if I should continue to do this next season.

You mention that "kids should understand how to behave". I agree that is the case for healthy 8th graders. But this particular child/young adult doesn't appear to have any ability to effectively regulate or modulate her behavior. She seems to genuinely have some sort of condition or mental health problem that affects her ability to interact positively with the people around her. She is not a deliberate trouble-maker, but she has strong moods and surges of emotion that seem a bit uncontrollable and out-of-proportion to the triggering event.

A month ago, her parents initiated a conversation with me, acknowledging that their daughter has issues and is struggling. However, the conversation didn't make things any easier for me, because during the course of the conversation the parents mentioned that being goalie on my team is something that their daughter truly values.

It seems the best I can do in this tricky situation is to limit her time in goal to just half the game -- but playing 30 minutes with poor goalkeeping generally leads to a scoring deficit that is difficult for the team to recover from. Regardless of how strong I set up the defense, there are going to be at least a few shots on target, and with her in goal most of these shots get into the net.[/quote]
Start with announcing a rotation policy. Not just for goalie but for all positions. The reason is so everyone gets a chance to develop and improve at all positions. Stress the fairness factor. Then it won't seem like it's a policy against her (even though it is). And make sure to follow through so rotations are happening for every player and every position. Ideally this is how it should be in 8th grade rec soccer anyway. The best case would be once she gets to play on the field she'll be more comfortable in another position and won't need to be in goal as much. Use quarterly shifts so there are 4 per game. When she protests offer to give her 2 shifts per game, more than everyone else. Again, maybe she gets used to field positions in a game or two and you can change it to 1 shift or even none each game. Maybe include her in the planning. Ask her which 2 shifts she would want (first and last, first and third, etc.).[/quote]

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