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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Gray rock isn't silent treatment. It's not reacting when they provoke you or ignoring questions that they can use to attack you. What type of things does she do that bother you?[/quote]
She’s very emotionally unstable AND volatile, sometimes at the same time. It’s hard to explain, there is just always this tension, like you’re walking on eggshells with her. You have to be careful what you say. Even the most benign comments she might take personally, or find a way to make them about her in a negative way. I’m tired of tiptoeing and censoring even the most benign topics of discussion to make her comfortable. Not everything is about her! I hope I’m making sense. Basically, she will turn everything around on you, even ketchup. Once, I asked for ketchup for the table, and they brought a restaurant branded ketchup. She made a huge deal about how disgusting it is not to bring Heinz. I simply said, “I don’t mind. I’ll use it.” And she gave me the cold shoulder for months after that, claiming I judged her. [/quote]

Grey rock is pretty much doing that and letting her cold shoulder roll off your back. (Ha.) So if the says you were judging her later, you look puzzled and say “Huh. That wasn’t my intention. Sorry. Anyway, how about that sports team?”

You’re basically assuming that she’ll respond like a normal person, and if she doesn’t then she looks bananas. [/quote]

I would argue that OP did not grey rock her SIL because she inserted information about herself (and something subjective) in the conversation. I think grey rocking is more like "Huh, you're right, it's not Heinz!" and then going ahead and eating the ketchup. SIL can't argue with you then; you agreed with her! You just only mentioned the part of her rant that was a fact. And then you went on from there and left it at that.

OP, you can always ask your SIL about something and then just daydream while she answers and then talk to your brother a bit. Hopefully that will keep your SIL off your back.

And ultimately, you might just want to join the We Do Not Care Club and not worry about her response. Good luck![/quote]

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