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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If he has a job and a family, he's consternation a functional adult so there's no point in chasing down a diagnosis ‐‐ that's what ASD DH's psychiatrist and nuerologist have said[/quote]

I disagree with this. By all measures I was a functional adult when I got an official ADHD diagnosis, and yet the dx was really game-changing for me. For one thing, it really helped me snap my life into place a little better. I began to create systems that were mine alone, rather than trying to fit into the systems everyone said I should use but that had never quite worked for me. So I just got BETTER at things. Also, there was a lot of stuff from the past that had registered only as shame or embarassment, that suddenly I could see through the lens of, "oh, that was just my undiagnosed ADHD. Huh." It was like a psychic weight being lifted. I suddenly had empathy for my younger self, not castigation.

YMMV, but a diagnosis can be both helpful and liberating.

OP, can you find an indirect way into the conversation? Just ask more general questions about what working well, what he's struggling with, what has he learned this year about the world, what has he learned this year about himself. Don't push, but maybe just create the space for him in which he could tell you.[/quote]

thx, appreciate this really helpful post. am thinking of a way to reach out to him while he's away at school.[/quote]

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