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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Family is important as is celebrating holidays. Since you say family is local, can DD drive over for Rosh Hashanah dinner, stay for two hours, then drive home to do homework?

In our big, Jewish, academically-driven family this happened often, as did kids all piling into one room to do homework from various schools together. It was like Family Study Hall. [/quote]

OP again I see my mother has entered the thread  :)

Seriously, family is important, but we could care less about specific holidays. We aren't religious at all. There's no upside to having family dinner on Monday night versus Friday night for us. And if I add too much to my kids schedule, she will still want to do the same amount of work, she's 17, not 12. She will just be more stressed. I think I mention we have had my mom over for dinner twice since school started (when dinner is at our house, my daughter can come and be social for 60-90 minutes and then excuse herself) and are spending two weekends with her in the fall alone. I'm just holding the line on filling entire weekday evenings.

Honestly, she works hard, but I never thought of her as /over/ scheduled. She picked her own course load. And she has a fair amount of friends who have a sport that practices daily until 6 or 7. I have no idea how those kids do it.

She's a pretty serious musician, like she could go to conservatory if she wanted to. But she literally came to me last year, as a sophomore, and said she noticed her friends in youth orchestra going for conservatory education had grades that really suffered by junior year. She decided she wants to study music at a regular university, so she can focus on academics. So I think she has her head together around what she wants to spend her time on and what she can handle.

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