Reply to What happens to students getting accommodations in college once they graduate?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As a parent of a special needs kid, I have to admit that I wonder about this.  Everybody loves to talk about the SP kid that went on to do great things.  Fine, I'm happy for them.  But is this typical or is it rare?  I've never seen data showing the distribution of how these things end up.  A few feel good stories doesn't make me think all is going to be okay for my kid.  I wish I knew what typically happens to these kids.[/quote]

Totally agree. I have a dc with anxiety, adhd and learning disabilities and already he plans on living with us forever. I keep telling him he is going to have to work but I can't imagine him in a career.  I had a cousin (would be about 65 if he were still alive).  If born today, he probably would be classified as HFA but he never got help for his "issues."  He bounced around a lot of jobs and then found a small pharmacist owned drug store and got a job there. He was the delivery person and did various other tasks. The owner really looked out for him and would call relatives if there was a problem.  I was a child at the time but now I realize just how special that store owner was to take my cousin under his wing.[/quote]

YES, I realize an anecdote isn't data, but I have a similar story with my brother.  He is 35, has [i]pronounced[/i] ADHD-inattentive and was never actually "accommodated" (because he's 35, and there was no IDEA-504-IEP matrix).  He's also bright as hell, and he also self-medicates with alcohol.  He's also super handsome (relevant for landing jobs, let's admit).

His story:  A new job every 12-18 mos.  Let go or fired or right-sized out of every job he's had.   Forgets to show up, can't deliver on projects, can't complete multi-step tasks.  Protracted periods of unemployment because he is paralyzed.  then depression, then drinking and sleeping until noon.

Then a new job, which he loses in 13 months because he doesn't deliver and forgets to do key things.  Then fiance dumps him.  More drinking, collection agency calls, more paralysis.

Finally, a family friend just like the guy in ^^^ PPs story hears about brother, creates job for brother, and practically holds his hand 5 days a week to get that job done.  If brother slips up, family friend kicks his ass verbally like Tony Soprano and makes him shape up.  If brother doesn't show up for work one day, family friend drives to his apartment and bangs on door and puts unshowered brother into his car and drives him to office himself.

Brother is slowly paying down debt, and has ADHD meds for 1st time in his life and ADHD counseling (thanks for health insurance for the 1st time in 5 years).

Although I am well aware this is just one story, I bet it's incredibly common.   I deeply believe these adhd-FAIL people require life-long hand holding, in the form of a parent, spouse, etc.  My brother's therapist, incidentally, readily agrees.

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