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[quote=Anonymous]I have an almost 4 year old and a 5.5 year old.

First of all - is he getting enough sleep? That's mission critical. A 4-5 year old who doesn't nap needs 10.5-12 hours of sleep a night. If you're having that much trouble getting him out of bed, sounds like bedtime needs to be earlier.

Then - the big thing I see here is that you're not enforcing what you say. It sounds like you're saying "it's time to get up" for the first time at 6:45am, and this kid is getting out of bed at 7:15am. So, you have essentially trained your kid that when you say it's time to get out of bed, what that actually means is - listening to me is optional, feel free to continue sleeping. If he needs to get out of bed at 6:45am, you drag him out of bed at 6:45am. With a non-compliant kid in this age range, you need to be ready to back up your requests, immediately.

I have, in my head, benchmarks of when these things need to be done. You need to be awake by 7:45. You need to be dressed and sitting down for breakfast by 8:05. You need to be done with breakfast by 8:20, and we walk out the door at 8:25. So at 7:45am, I go to the kids' room and anyone who is still in bed gets woken up and gets out of bed. If I have to drag you out, that's what I do. Then I stay and make sure anyone who isn't dressed is getting dressed. If I have to help them, I do. But you're not playing or doing anything fun until you get dressed, and if I say it's time to get dressed, then not moving means that mommy is going to dress you, which is what we call "the hard way" and it's not fun. If you're not done with breakfast, you get a 5 minute warning, then a 1 or 2 minute warning, then a "take a last bite" and then breakfast gets taken away. 35-45 minutes to eat is ridiculous.

You can't say "do this thing" and then walk away when he hasn't even started, and then come back 5 minutes later and say "I said do this thing" and then come back 5 minutes and yell "why aren't you doing the thing, come on!!" and expect him to listen. You've actively trained him that he doesn't have to listen to you! Stay there, and make him do it.

On the positive reinforcement side, if you are done before you have to start the next thing, you can play a little. So, if you're up at 7:30? Play. Dressed by 7:50? Play. Done with breakfast by 8:10? Play. Ready to walk out the door at 8:20? Play. That really helps my kids, as they want time to play, and there's really immediate natural consequences - get dressed fast, you can play! Get dressed slowly, it's breakfast time, too bad, no playtime. But you've got another shot at five minutes of playing if you eat fast. [/quote]

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