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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We had to move my mom into an assisted living facility fairly quickly due to some extenuating circumstances.  She has significant physical limitations and probably some memory/very mild dementia issues but for the most part her challenges are physical (post-stroke about 6 months, limited mobility.) She is miserable, says the activities are all passive (movie, speakers etc) and hasn't yet made any social connections.  We got fortunate in the place we found for her, it seems nice enough, has won some local "best of" type awards, [b]but I get why she is unhappy. Whenever I"m here people just seem to be sitting in their rooms watching TV (with doors open to hallway.)[/b] So my question is - is this just what assisted living looks like everywhere?  Do facilities exist that have engaging activities and decently social lives for residents? She wants to move to a better place but I'm not sure if that exists for her situation. Not in DMV so just wondering in general.[/quote]
No, not every place looks like that, there is huge variation. Go and visit as many as you can. Visiting in person is really the only way to get a good read on the atmosphere. Bonus points for facilities that will see you on short notice and at odd hours. Awards and reviews are one thing to check, but things change, ownership, significant staff turnover. I would not be so dismissive of your mom as some in this post. You are visiting and noticing that what she says is true. See if there is something better out there. If you can't find a better place, maybe the budget can accommodate some paid companions who will engage with her.[/quote]

Find a place where those in AL are still engaging with each other.  Same for Nursing care, if possible.  My uncle (90+) is in nursing care (and memory is declining), and when I visit, after breakfast they take residents to the lounges and there are 5-7 of them watching TV "together", some more aware of the others than others are.  But they are not simply in their beds or in their wheelchairs in their rooms, they are moving around during the day so they have different places to be.  Some of them are able to do puzzles and play games still as well, as their memory is not as declined and they are more there for physical issues.  
But yes, there are places where the residents gather together for activities even in AL and nursing care.  And they should be eating together as well if possible.

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