Reply to Shy young adult who can’t ask for things or advocate for himself. Wwyd?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Dc is 19 and book smart, hard working but his social skills are weak.. he has friends but not close ones, he had a GF for awhile but she broke up with him.

He’s just shy and scared to advocate for himself. Examples, at dinner, he won’t ask the wait staff for things, he wants me to do it. He lives with roommates now but tip toes around them bc he doesn’t want to upset them (he wouldn’t let me turn on a light in the living room, as ex).

I’m so worried for him. He’s been on an SSRI to help with anxiety in the past but weaned off on his own, and says he doesn’t need it.

WWYD? [/quote]

Honestly, I can relate to your situation.  My child is a little younger (16) - but social skills were never his thing.  To be honest, he LOVED lockdown during COVID.  He never complained that he didn't get see his friends or anything like that.  He wasn't disliked at school and never bullied.  However, he is very shy and introverted.  One thing that your son has going is that he at least had a girlfriend and therefore, has some skills to make truly meaningful connections (even if the relationship didn't work out).  I would just push him to do more - a little at a time.  Even in my own life, I remember being scared to call Dominio's pizza to order (before ordering online was a thing) when I was a teen.

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