Reply to What to do with mean kids at school

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Many middle schoolers don’t like when their peers try to enforce rules.

Your kid needs to figure out the pecking order or figure out how to project toughness. Preferably both.

It sucks but that’s been the reality of American middle schools for decades and it’s only getting worse. [/quote]

Happy to hear more about projecting toughness in such case. Any advice on what to say or behave? [b]But tbh I don’t quite agree with the pecking order thing.

According to my dd (just realized I typed ds above), this girl is one of the group of “popular” kids at school.[/b] Very stereotypical group that is loud, not listening, and ONLY cares about fashion, social media and attractiveness to the other gender. I’m not going to tell my dd that she and her group is at a lower level in the “hierarchy” at school. That’s ridiculous!!
[/quote]

So you acknowledge she’s popular. Your daughter needs to figure it out for herself, like I said.

[/quote]

I do acknowledge it. However, not the type of popularity I want my child to have anyway. The popularity here is defined by visibility and attention, dominance in social circles, skewed by current school values and trends, and caused by immaturity. I’m not sure there is anything I want my child to figure it out for herself here. It’s a fact, doesn’t mean it’s right. [/quote]

It would serve her well to figure out exists and how it works, even if she chooses to participate in genuine friendships with nice people.

These types of people are not going away. [/quote]

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