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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm very sorry, OP. You need to prioritize yourself. I'm in a similar situation, and sometimes I feel the only reason I'm still alive is that my kids still need me.

I'm not quite sure what prioritizing oneself means, in the context of straightened funds, demands on one's time and an abusive spouse... but I listen to classical music, try to read good books and uplifting movies and spend time with my friends and children.

Is your mother on a waitlist for the appropriate government facility? She needs to be. You can't kill yourself trying to do everything, poor dear.
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She can have in home care covered up to 24/7 but she refuses. Same for a home, she refuses and it would be sad for her. [/quote]

You are projecting your own mental state on your mother.   Get a geriatric social worker who can tell you what to do since you are too weak to make decisions.   Get someone else to take your child to college.  They probably can’t wait to get away from the dysfunction.  Talk to a divorce lawyer who can tell you how to protect your money as much as possible.  Start spending down  what you have to manage mom, child, and your needs so there is less for the husband you should have divorced years ago. [/quote]

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