Reply to Vent: I’m tired of caretaking.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Well, we are75 and 77 and are still  actively parenting our youngest daughter 41 who has a 
cognitive disability.  Talk about managing affairs for one with Medicare, Medicaid and a Medicaid Waiver along with SSDI!! She is very active as she works PT and volunteers weekly
at a senior center in the cafe.  So we are driving her to these as well as recreational activities and weekly piano lessons.

It is hard in the sense that our options on future care for her are limited because she does not fit the profile of a CCRC even if in independent living.  We have excellent LTC
Insurance, but still it will be hard to manage aging with her even with one of her two sister. willing to work on a plan of care in the future.  
 What I will say is that you have to set limits  on what you can do in supporting a person.
Spend money on a sitter as we do with a college student for outings weekly.  We can go out, but would mot leave her overnight.  Do not feel bad if you say no to a care request if you need time to enjoy your spouse or children.  At least with an older person there 
can be options of care considered that we will not have so easily to access.  Right now we 
living a retirement life for three and keep praying and doing what we can for good health.

One tho g I would say is that folks who have the option should look ahead to where they want to live in terms of when they may need a lot of health care , may not be such good drivers etc.[/quote]

That’s a lot. You two sound like you are doing such a good job and that you are helping her live as full a life as she can.

My friend (a single parent) is in a similar situation yet was able to find a residential program where the adult child can live. From her experience, I know it’s a lot of worry and work.

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