Reply to I hate being a mother right now

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What's the issue OP? Are they boys/girls?

I have to say that while I miss the cute and cuddly phase, I really enjoy hanging out with my teens (most of the time.) Our main disagreements are about them picking up after themselves, getting their laundry and chores done, etc.[/quote]

+1
I think I’m a better parent to the teens than I was for babies.  I loved them as babies but I found it all a bit of a slog - tough in ways I didn’t enjoy - like getting vomit in my hair right before I leave for a board meeting OR having a poop diaper leak out the side onto my nice clothes.  I don’t miss those moments and teens just don’t do that.  I love watching my kids make good decisions as teens.

I absolutely love seeing the fruit of my parenting, those moments where you see the lessons that you worked so hard to teach them sink in and they’ve owned their own moral compass an behaved with the type of good judgement and integrity you envisioned when you gave them all the redirective parenting when they were younger.  I seriously wondered if any of it was sinking in at times - as teens you get to see all of that put to the test.

I also had moments where I said things like “It is very clear you know more than me at your 15 years.  I know I just fell off the blueberry truck yesterday and became someone who has not lived in this world for XX years.  You are totally ready to go out free in this world without any guidance, support, or money because you have nothing left to learn from me.”  Those statements grounded my kids pretty quickly - half tongue in cheek with just enough truth.  Sometimes I threw in statements like “do you talk to your teachers/mentors/coaches in that tone of voice?  No?  It is so disrespectful to me that you treat them better than your parents.  They don’t love you near as much as we do; it doesn’t seem fair to me.  Does it seem fair to you?”  It was usually enough to get them to run off to their room and apologize a couple hours later.[/quote]

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