Reply to Stay or go - keep amazing flexibility v. exciting new challenge

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Honestly, with the additional info, I switch my vote to no. Your kids are young still. Four days a week in the office plus travel means you will see them a ton less. You have “been responsible for all the kid chauffeuring” (why??) but now your spouse is going to be super flexible and do it all? It seems wishful. [/quote]

This is honestly my biggest fear. When we talked about it, he said we would have to hire a nanny. I was like… or you could do more? That had apparently not crossed his mind. [/quote]

Eek yeah that isn't very hopeful op. It sounds like what will probably end up happening is you will have more on your plate at work and still the same at home (or your increased salary will be eaten up by nanny costs). I wonder if this unevenness in coparenting is partly why you're feeling the urge to do this - it was notable that you said "want permission to put myself first" - it sounds like things have been uneven for awhile and that is understandably taxing and frustrating. This feels like an opportunity to even things out a little more. You get to do something exciting and your husband has to become more 50/50. I would just make sure that is really going to happen and that this isn't going to add a lot of stress.

It sounds like you think you need to leave this current job eventually either way, so it probably makes sense to take it if it will bring a lot of future opportunity. But the compensation doesn't seem that significant of a change to me given the change in benefits (increased cost of healthcare and retirement match). So I would mostly call that a wash. For me the decision is really more of a long term one if you think this is truly a fantastic fit for you and will be for future opportunities. If so, then go for it. But get your husband more on board.[/quote]

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