Reply to How to handle parent with severe mental health issue

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[quote=Anonymous]My heart goes out to you and your family. I recognize myself in your post. First, realize that you are important and your kids will only be young once. Try hard to protect the quality of time you devote to your marriage and kids; the other can be so consuming.

My situation differed in that my parents were poor, mom had significant physical health problems that required frequent in-patient hospital care, and (so lucky) mom ended up dying before dad.

1. Thank the stars that your mom doesn’t have severe mental illness combined with severe physical health problems. You haven’t experienced true helpless until you’ve been in a situation where the mental health ward won’t admit her because they can’t treat the ohysical, and the regular health ward won’t admit her because of the mental illness.

2.  Make sure your dad has regular, paid respite relief. They are blessed with resources.

3. You absolutely cannot be the primary care giver if dad goes first. It’s untenable. What you describe is a women who requires round-the-click care. Do your research now, get on a waiting list now for a good place, and make sure you finalize all the paperwork that gives you medical and financial power of attorney to move her if dad goes first.

4. Your mom is in no place to be involved in decisions related to this plan.

Sending hugs.[/quote]

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