Reply to Worried about freeloader sibling when parents pass

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]100% the parents’ fault for not seeking a diagnosis for their child when treatment could have made a difference.

All of these failures to launch have mental health issues, probably some form of autism and the accompanying anxiety/OCD/ADHD/health issues that are so often comorbid.

I’ve worked SO hard with my oldest, who has ASD/ADHD/OCD to hoist him into college. Then we’ll have to hoist him into a job. Our goal is financial independence for him, so he’s not a burden on his siblings. All my kids are well aware of this goal. My son himself understands he needs to support himself - even though every day tasks are hard for him.

You are a victim, but don’t forget the failures are victims too. They were never given a chance.[/quote]

This is the truth. But I don't know what the solution is for the OP at this point.[/quote]

I'm the PP you replied to. The only solution is for OP to warn the family that she is unable to provide support for her sibling. And then, if something terrible happens, it will be up to OP to decide whether she wants to swoop in. I have a friend who pays the bills directly for a drug addicted sibling. The sibling cannot be trusted with the money, but occasionally helping with the rent or food ensures they have the basics. But this strictly on a case-by-case basis and it's best if OP makes clear now that the sibling cannot count on anything.
 [/quote]

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