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[quote=Anonymous]I think about this a lot. I think the upshot is that you need to be the type of person that your kids want to have a relationship with, and you need to model for them the important of family.
DH is one of two boys and I now have two boys. MIL and I had a good relationship until we had kids. Then she started being extremely difficult to be around for reasons I won’t get into. I realized that she was not a very nice person but that I had glossed over it/she had never trained her venom on me before. 
I am still cordial/polite, and I facilitate her seeing our kids (weekly facetime, visits, etc). But because of the way that she’s treated us, DH only sees/talks to her out of obligation and not because he enjoys her company. Even with how much this woman has hurt me, I can’t tell you how sad I find this whole situation. I actually am usually the one pushing for us to do more because, as a mom, I would be so heartbroken if my kids felt this way about me, and I imagine it’s hard for her. But I also think - why didn’t she invest in more meaningful relationships with her kids over the years? Why does she say such mean and insensitive things to and about me and us? We have gone around and around, and the obstacle to a deeper relationship is her. So just don’t be like that. [/quote]

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