Reply to Kids telling me all their negative stuff

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]wow maybe i'm in the minority here but I love it when my kids tells me bad things. Most of her bad things are really NBD but I just listen and validate. I want her to come to me when it's a really bad thing, and she needs my help. I want that door to be open for her.[/quote]

This.  It’s exhausting, but I want her to tell me the crappy little things so she’ll tell me the crappy big things.   She’s still relatively young -almost a tween.

I am also actively just trying to be sympathetic and ask her for suggestions on what she should do.

The human garbage disposal is what I’ve heard it called.  My husband will comment that she seems fine, then I come home and she unloads with all of the slights she felt all day.  He thinks it’s because I’m soft, but it’s because I’m the safe-space.

And the flip side is I’m close to a young adult family member - when I worry is when she’s overloaded, but insisting on not setting boundaries and isn’t complaining.  Both of her parents are lovely people, who do really adore her, but they are both so self-centered they weren’t safe-sounding boards for her when she was younger.  [/quote]

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