Reply to Best Friend Pressuring Me To Invite Quasi Friend to My Wedding

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[quote=Anonymous]While it would have been more calm and less dramatic to come out with "Did you lobby for an invitation for me to her wedding" -- Your "best" friend was utterly out of line to make the ask of you. I would not disinvite best friend, though from the post, her behavior and the fact you're contemplating disinviting her to such an important event, I do question how close you really feel to her. I would drop this entirely and act as if it never happened, since your response clearly shut her down and she's likely embarrassed enough not to ask again. Forget quasi-friend entirely.

Also, was this unusual for your friend to do? Unexpected, out of character? Or does she already have a history of barging in and asking or expecting you to do things she wants, the way she wants them?

If this is typical for her, rethink the closness of this friendship (but again, don't disinvite--that frankly would be a bit extreme and would probably create talk and drama among all your friends).

If this is NOT typical for her at all, show her some grace and forgive her. Maybe this other woman has been pressuring your friend to the point friend just wanted to get her off her back. If you and friend actually are close, you should be able to ask her that--"Was Sally bugging you to do this for her? I'm sorry she did that, and let's forget it all and just focus on the wedding."

If friend is usually trying to fix other people's relationships, again, you can talk with her about that when you've cooled down. "I know you want people always to get along and want all your friends to be friends with each other. That's a kind and sweet trait about you. In this case, I'm not friends with Quasi and a wedding day is about having real, close friends to celebrate with, like you. Please don't try to 'fix' my relationship with Quasi because there isn't a relationship there to fix."
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