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Reply to "Question for Supervisors: Is it disrespectful to call in to a meeting vs. MS TEAMS?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, are you a youngish black woman? I detect attitude along with a cynical hatred of “the Man.” You’re determined not to let your job and boss “own you,” but you’re in a system that requires their support. It seems like your self-respect comes from not letting others get any more of you than is absolutely necessary. But, the reality is that you seem unfriendly, emotionally stingy, distant, and even arrogant. You can be your own person without making work a mere “transaction.” People are hired because they can do the job, want to do the job, and are a joy to work with. It sounds like you can do the job, but couldn’t care less about the job and its people. Keep that up and you won’t go far in life. To see what I mean, imagine yourself as the boss and you’re running your own company. Now, imagine interacting with an employee who just wishes you would get out of their face. Do you want your money paying someone like that or would you prefer someone who makes work enjoyable?[/quote] OP Here Wow, close! Youngish, woman of color (not black). But yes, you are correct. I am amazed at your assessment. I am very emotionally stingy, distant. I could be arrogant depending on the topic. Work is definitely a transaction for me. I don't care much about the people and over the years less about the job. I definitely wish would my boss would get out of my face and let me do my job. I have never enjoyed working with 80 percent of the people I have met throughout my career. Very good assessment. Now how do I change to be more like everyone else?[/quote] Poster who wrote original comment here. As for caring about your work, get in a line of work that you care about. As for the people thing, you need to do some reflection and maybe consider therapy. It strikes me that you have an issue with people in authority. Your gut response is to see them as the enemy and to respond accordingly. Why is that? Did you or your family have some pivotal experiences? Did you heavily engage in university classes that stressed oppressor/victim relationships? If so, you need to re-evaluate this line of thinking because it’s not productive. EVERY relationship has power dynamics, but that doesn’t mean every relationship has to be antagonistic. For example, a parent has a lot of power over a child, but that power can be used to provide for and guide the child to positive outcomes, like financial independence and emotional maturity. Likewise, the child - perhaps unknowingly - has power over their parent. When a child responds well to the parent, the parent is proud and wants to help even more. Cynically, this could be interpreted as manipulation, but it is also love. Love is when someone extends themselves for your benefit. The love cycle works best when it is met with appreciation and reciprocation. [/quote]
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