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Reply to "Where to place a high functioning autistic adult"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have a 30 year old adult sibling who has become increasingly violent. He began living with me after our parents died over a decade ago. He is very high functioning but does not work and chose to not attend higher education. He also has ocd, severe oppositional defiant disorder and narcissistic tendencies. [b]He refuses to go to any therapy and when we have been able to get him to go he refuses medication.[/b] Tonight was the last straw. Because he said I was “mean” by telling him he needed to clean up the kitchen he turned to my very old dog and threw her out of the house and pushed me out of the house as well. I was wearing a robe as I had just left the shower and he pulled it off of me as he did this so I was nude outside with my dog locked out. When I got back inside after taking the hidden key outside I was irate and yelled at him so he turned the gas stove on. He then poured oil all over it. We had a small kitchen fire which destroyed my microwave and the surrounding cabinets and if I didn’t have a fire extinguisher on hand I don’t know what would have happened. He is clearly extremely dangerous to himself and others. Where do you put people like this besides jail? [/quote] OP, does “we” indicate others who you can discuss his latest behavior with in real life, such as his doctors? Those are major medications (that he’s not taking), and a very complicated mental health situation. If you can ascertain experienced professional advice, asap, that would be ideal. What you just went through is traumatic, and there are resources available to provide some assistance with the next decision-making steps. Meanwhile, if need be, consider staying somewhere else with your dog as needed to clear your head, start making some calls, and see what better options there are. If that’s not possible, even visiting a local coffee shop for an hour or two to get started could help. Also, if you have a car available and nearby, you might keep a “go bag” with basic necessities for a couple of days in it, in case you need to leave in a hurry for your safety. You might also start adding and backing up secure copies of important documentation to your phone, for quick reference in an emergency. Please seek out professional, community, and/or municipal resources, as soon as possible. This is too much burden for one person to handle alone. [/quote] There really isn’t a we. I have no support from family when it comes to him. Nobody wants to take him on in their home or help financially. He is not under a guardianship so I can’t force him to do anything. Nobody has ever called the police on him, rather letting his tantrums run its course and quietly cleaning up the mess. He has been having tantrums his whole life and usually it ends with something of value destroyed. There have been times when I have had psychologists come to the home that resulted in him locking himself in his room and times where he was brought to an in office appointment where he literally refused to speak or got up and left. I also can’t force him to go the psychiatrist appointments or take medication. [/quote]
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