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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My spouse and I don’t fight often-maybe 2/3 times a year (I’m not counting tiny disagreements that happen within daily life. But when we do he makes up for the infrequency with a terrible temper and then going completely silent until I break. He never apologizes. He never takes responsibility. I hate it so much. I have told him numerous times that his response to fighting is not how an adult person should be handling it but this is just who he is. [b]He is a great father and a good husband during regular times.[/b] But I mean, fighting is a part of marriage and his response makes me so angry every time it happens. I am in therapy and now simply walk away when it happens but it doesn’t change his response. He will not do therapy and thinks it’s pointless.

Sometimes I think about spending the rest of my life like this and I want to throw up. He quite literally reacts like a 12 year old.

I have tried numerous strategies-giving him space, telling him not to talk to me in a certain tone. It seems to just add fuel to the fire. Nothing changes.

Anybody have experience with a spouse like this?[/quote]

So you are able to fully get over how he acts once it has passed? I feel like I'd have a hard time viewing him as a great husband the rest of the time if I were waiting for this shoe to drop every four months or so. [/quote]

NP.
It would take me 2-3 days of feeling like I needed to call a lawyer, shrink or police on him after one of his rage attacks. Plus one year he threatened divorce 40+ times as a way to stop a talk or one of his arguments he started to avoid a topic.

It was very destabilizing. Not the threat of abandonment, just the loss of what to do in what order given our jobs, the kids, the family court, and how high conflict he always became when questioned. [/quote]

What happened? I just went through a year like that with the divorce threats. Wondering if your DH calmed down, if you left him… our kids are early elementary.[/quote]

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