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[quote=Anonymous]OP, if this visit is weighing on you so much, why not shorten it?  Maybe the sun has set on her coming to your house for long periods of time?  Why not schedule a 4-5 day visit and dig deep and take her with you when you leave the house?  Watch movies with her when you need some down time?

My mom - beginning stages of dementia and controlling narcissist - is pretty much a nightmare with moments of peace in between the tantrums and silent treatment.  Visiting her is exhausting and soul sucking.  I get it.  But if you aren't willing to hire someone to be with her and you want a break from her while she visits - what are your options, really?

The last time I went to see my mom, I stayed in a hotel and it made so much difference to have that space.  Maybe you phase out her visits to you and do some short visits to where she lives where you can put some space between the two of you, and she is in her trusted environment.

Sending you empathy because your situation, like mine, is heart-breaking and draining.[/quote]

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