Reply to the stuff of COPS shows ....

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "the stuff of COPS shows ...."

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]definitely not bragging about this. sick to my stomach about it.

My poor parents just wanted a nice weekend away as a family -- posting here because I am so ashamed of the role I played and my DH played in this.[/quote]

[b]I’m sending you a hug and begging you to put shame aside. Shame is what isolates those of us with family mental health issues from getting support and help. It’s not a productive emotion because it creates secrets and loneliness. Don’t let anyone here try to guilt or shame you for your brother’s behavior. Anyone who is judging you probably has never come close to a sibling who is mentally ill and unbalanced. [/b]I’m writing this to you as someone whose SIL repeatedly blamed my infant for messing various parts of my SiL’s life up and eventually attempted to smother her with a pillow…and I got blamed by others for not being understanding enough of SIL’s struggles.[/quote]

This exactly. That is mature of you to be ashamed of buying into the crazy. But I know how you got there.

Best advice: Cut off contact w bro. Explain to your children that your brother has something wrong with his brain that is causing the outbursts and behaviour and apologize- only to the kids- for allowing him into their lives but assure them you won't need to see him again until he gets help. Forgiveness is important to teach- but more important is healthy boundaries.

As for how to address your parents- well everyone has a different threshold for how much to allow enablers into their lives- but I'd have to only engage with them without brother and not ever discuss him again. They aren't helping him at all- but they probably will never see it that way. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics