Reply to Vent about my cruel immature mother

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm sorry OP. My mother is a stunted bitter materialistic woman. What was enlightening to me was hearing that other people recognized it in her as well, and viewed it negatively in her. It reflects poorly on her, not you.[/quote]

Thanks. OP here. I appreciate knowing I’m not alone or crazy. My mother has alienated most people in her life and has only casual acquaintances at this point. However, she has a way of always making distance/growing apart about the other person, and not her. People pull away in a way that’s deliberate but do so quietly. It would have made all the difference in the world if just once an aunt or older cousin or neighbor had said to me “you know what? Your mom is not a nice person!”. Instead, the people who still have overlapping relationships with me and my mother walk on eggshells about the entire thing.

I got a text from the relative who was on the FT call. It sounds like my mom spent the visit badmouthing other, long-dead relatives and making it a bonding thing. That’s the hardest part. She takes history and twists and recasts it to fit her narrative. People somehow buy into it and it becomes reality. Part of why I don’t totally go no contact is so I can pretend I have some kind of control of the false narrative my mother is distributing out into the world.[/quote]

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