Reply to At what age does a 10 year age gap become less problematic? Everyone

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's problematic in late teens to mid 20s. Not problematic at all 30s-50s. But, depending on the individuals involved, it can become problematic again 60s-70s-80s.

DH and I are 7 years apart, so I'm not criticizing an age difference. But if we were any further apart, I'd start worrying about staying in synch during our golden years.[/quote]

Agreed. My parents had a 10 year age gap, and it was fine until my father died. It was like my mother immediately aged 10 years and caught up to him and that stage of life. I don't think it was becoming a widow itself, I think she mentally jumped to "my life partner aged and died, now my life is over as well and I'm just waiting to age and die." Which as someone in her mid-60's, slowed her down tremendously, both physically and cognitively. That's grief, but I think the age difference made it more complicated and three years later she doesn't seem like she'll ever fully bounce back.

It's been really hard to watch, and I don't think every early widow(er) would react the same way. But those last few years and the years since have been hard enough that I'd caution my own kids against such a large age gap with casual dating, unless it was their one true love and destiny and all.[/quote]

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