Reply to Feeling Lost

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[quote=Anonymous]I really feel for the situation you're in, OP, and reading what you're going through broke my heart. It's tough being a parent/mother/daughter/wife, and there are times in life when I think it's easy to get depressed because you feel that who YOU are becomes lost in all of those consuming roles.

I agree with the other posters that you should drop BF'ing and move to formula and have your DH help more with this. I did it both times when babies were 4 months and I never once regretted it.

It sounds to me like you are afraid of being a failure to everyone around you, and perhaps that is a major source of the frustration in your life. Do you feel that by abandoning BF'ing, you are short-changing your child?

Sounds like you play the role of savior/supporter/carer to everyone from the work place, to the immediate home (husband being out of work and you have to keep things afloat), and your dying parent. Do you not have any siblings to help out in that regard?

Apart from asking your husband to help out with the night feedings and other domestic chores that may fall on you, I would also be sure to talk to him and let him know how you're feeling. It's really important to communicate these feelings, and I would try to do so not just with your husband but with a good friend, or whoever else happens to be close in your life.

Posting your feelings on an anonymous forum like this is not enough. You need to find someone you can go have a drink with and who will listen while you get all this shit out.
Keeping it all in is dangerous, and surely will elad you down a path to worse depression than you may already be experiencing.

Exercise is also important. Sounds to me like you don't have a mere 2 minutes to yourself ever. Find a way of making some time for yourself, whether it be to go and exercise, meet up with a friend, go to a movie, whatever, but I think this is something you should have your husband understand. That it's not selfish asking for this but a matter of you staying SANE!

Good luck. I feel for you, and I hope you will feel better soon and will get some help (can't your co-workers pick up some of the slack at the office?!). I do want to add that the stage of being mother to toddler and baby is one of the toughest, roughest ones!! [/quote]

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