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[quote=Anonymous]I can relate in that I have a sister who makes far more than I do but is incredibly irresponsible with money and volatile, chaotic and spiteful so she gets into legal disputes. I also have another relative who lives large and has decided to become extra close to my aging mother. Mom will be rewarding both and giving us less if anything. She didn't earn the money-my late father did and she is going against his wishes.Of course I suspect my sister will end up suing the relative who suddenly became close to get even more money. So at least I will be able to stay out of that mess.

You cannot let these things eat you alive. Highly dysfunctional people will be highly dysfunctional even until and after the grave.

It sounds like it is not a done deal. If your husband is offended, he can calmly let them know, but you cannot tell him what to do.

However, I would figure out boundaries with him that may impact you. I would make sure you are both on the same page about not ever giving a financial handout to the sister and you need to figure out your boundaries with helping the parents. The sister should do far more, but even if she doesn't, it does not mean your husband takes on more to the detriment of your family. They can use some of the money to hire people which means less money for the sister to blow.[/quote]

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