Reply to How do people do this: caregiving, kids, jobs, etc

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[quote=Anonymous]Op

You are awesome and doing an amazing job even if your elderly person says otherwise. Don’t listen to that unhappy grump.

Have you read of the Drama Triangle? I’ll explain…

I wonder if any of you are my siblings. So many of these people you describe are like my mother in her ALF complaining away.

My mother won’t do most activities and I’ve had to listen to the entire list and about how walking club did not work (she tried it once five months ago) and how watching a movie on TV doesn’t count as an activity because she can do that on her own…

Well, it is on her that she didn’t develop hobbies that she could do in old age. It’s not my job to entertain her every day.

I stepped into the rescuer role while she played victim. Quickly, I realized what I did and stepped back from being the rescuer. Eventually, she could not continue as the victim.

Op—If you stop playing your role in the triangle, the other person won’t be able to continue their unpleasant role.

Reading about the Drama Triangle helped me a lot.

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