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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]To confirm, you are an only child, OP? And you now live nearby?

Their care and running their household falls to you, you bring in paid help or you relocate them to a place that provides paid help or allows you to bring it in. No one talking at your dad is going to change the above.

Since you and your dad don't seem to get on all that well and your find him triggering, you may want to avoid the first option.

In assisted living they would still live in their own space, like an apartment, unless your mom's mobility means she will need skilled nursing? Can their current house even be retrofit re: her mobility issues? An assisted living will be handicapped accessible. [/quote]

No, I don’t live near them full time. I am based in DC and have a second home near them. But, my career is in DC. A career I could not get in my home state and I will need my DC pay to help them. I also have a decent amount of flexibility given my seniority.

I do have a sibling that has proved close to useless. Literally, didn’t care to point out (or maybe even notice) that my mom had lost a significant amount of weight. She had stopped eating in the couple months I had seen her. Sibling lives 20 minutes away.

I actually have a very good relationship with my dad up until this point. I wouldn’t say it is bad right now, but it is overwhelming being the only “adult” between three elderly adults (my 90+ yo grandma lives with them) and one sibling.

We are not at the point yet where they will accept moving to a different location, but I have started to look into high level. They absolute will not move into a SNF for a number of different reason (including personal experience with other family members). [/quote]

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