Reply to baby a product of a sexual assault

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[quote=Anonymous]Adoptive parent here.  On the question of whether to tell others, I agree that there is no reason to tell anyone including your mother.  Quite simply, it's your child's story, not yours, and it's not fair for you to share it without his knowledge.

On whether to tell the child, I think it could go either way.  Your child will be curious about who his birth parents were and why they could not take care of him.  Vague generalities won't do.  I think you might be able to come up with an appropriate way to say that the birth mother couldn't take care of him herself and so she came up with a plan to find parents who could take care of him and be his forever family, without mentioning the sexual assault.

In my experience asking adult adoptees, boys tend to be less interested in their birth parents so he may never want a more detailed explanation.  Of course, if he does want to know, or chooses to contact the birth mother and she tells him, I think I would tell rather than lie about it.[/quote]

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