Reply to What really is the role of a parent of 21-30

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It is hard not to give advice, because you have been where they are. And they are generally clueless /a babe in the woods

But I know I have to work to follow this advice. [/quote]

It's also good to remember, though, that you probably actually haven't been where they are. The world changes. They are different people. Different economy, different social expectations, etc.

A lot of what you learned from your own 20s experience simply won't be relevant or useful to them now. Maybe some of the broad strokes about responsibility, saving money, building a career or picking a partner. But VERY broad strokes.

Trying to give your 20-something kid advice on stuff like interviewing, dressing, dating, socializing, based on your experience doing the same thing 20-30 years ago? You will mostly sound like a dinosaur.

I think a better tactic is to ask questions. Not a million questions but just relevant questions as they make choices and find their way. You ask to understand, and also in asking it might spur them to think about certain things. Like as they start their job search, own up to the fact that you don't know how it works now, and ask what the steps are these days. You'll learn something, and it will force them to think critically about that task as something with steps that can be explained.

Much better approach than to sit there and lecture them on stuff you haven't done in decades. You know a lot less than you think![/quote]

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