Reply to S/o how did you know SAH in your twenties

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[quote=Anonymous]I’m the husband.  My spouse and I got married      decades ago and pretty young and pregnant.  getting pregnant.  We went off to grad school together with a baby in tow.  I got a law degree and she sought a graduate degree in another field at the same school.

I was working full time locally the summer after my first year of law school and she was a full time summer student trying to
accelerate her graduation.  We found a small, family run and very convenient day care for our oldest, who wasn’t quite two.

One day while bathing her she pointed to her private area and said something that caused me concern that she might have been molested in day care.   I told my wife and she shared my concern.  We went to the police and they, too, shared our concern but ultimately didn’t think they had nearly enough to prosecute.  Again, this was decades ago and things were different.

In the meantime, we told the university and they immediately made room for our daughter in a preschool affiliated with them that had
had no openings and was more expensive but they helped us on both fronts for which we were very grateful.

My spouse finished her program and graduated a year before I finished law school.  Knowing even before graduation that there would be no worthwhile job opportunities in the area for her after graduating, we decided to have another baby.  She stayed home with that one and our oldest.  Then I graduated and got a job with Biglaw and started making real money right away.  We decided together that it didn’t make sense that we both work and put the kids in day care when I was already making a lot of money (clearly more than she could have made then) and we were frankly traumatized by our prior day care experience.  In the end, she never did work outside the home and we had more kids.

We will never know what, if anything, really happened.  But we’re not alarmists or crazy or anything.  We remained convinced that something did.  So the bottom line is that that experience and my high income together made the decision that she would stay home for us.  It was never the plan before that.  [/quote]

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