Reply to Anyone else’s dh mailing it in bc they know you won’t leave the kids?

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[quote=Anonymous]Mine did for many years. There was a thread on here awhile ago about dropping the rope. I did that. I did exactly what I wanted to do for the kids with no expectation that he would help. Taking the kids to movies, arranging playdates, buying new clothes, sports practices, holiday stuff, (my) family traditions, homework help, etc. I did it for me. I spent his money. He didn't do as much as me, but more of his salary was used for our "support."

Covid helped him see the quantity of activities that I was doing, and he stepped up (some). But really I had to drop the resentment and lower my expectations. It'll never be even, but I feel better about the whole situation and he seems very appreciative.

Other things: I was pretty blunt about telling the kids what they could & couldn't expect from Dad. I got more explicit about giving him instructions and not doing things for him when he f*cked it up. I also handed over more responsibilities to the kids so I didn't feel like a servant. I stopped doing any errands or house fixes that I didn't want to do. My cleanliness standards were higher than his and I loosened that a bit.[/quote]

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