Reply to We chose not to redshirt DS without considering the long-term consequences:

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[quote=Anonymous]Like many things, though, it seems like some of this could be addressed via parenting and outlook. Especially being not ready for college. Gap years have become very common and are not looked down upon by colleges; depending on the application cycle, it could be to your advantage.

I also don't assume that being younger would automatically mean failing classes, especially if you are in a school system that tracks. You may be less likely to be placed on an advanced track, but there is not reason for being younger than classmates to mean you are going to fail math classes in high school. As a parent, you need to advocate for your child to be in the right class. I question how your son got to the point where he was failing math and having to retake it -- I am certain there are things you could have done to better support him so that he could have passed that class.

The orchestra things is, well, normal. For all kids. There are times when your peers are better than you at things and you have to work harder to achieve them. In the long run, it was probably beneficial to your son to have to work harder to get something he wanted, at an age where that likely taught him valuable lessons about pushing through disappointment.

I'm neither for nor against redshirting (it's entirely context dependent) but I don't read this as a compelling argument in favor of it. The best arguments I have seen for redshirting usually revolve around a child's physical and social development, since being significantly behind your cohort in those areas can cause problems that get worse as time goes on. But you don't seem to mention that at all.

It honestly sounds like maybe your son is not a stellar student and sometimes has to work hard to perform at grade level. I don't think that's a redshirting issue -- there's nothing special that happens in your brain between 16 and 17 that enables you to understand calculus.[/quote]

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