Reply to DH pulling me into the middle and expecting me to implement his ideas

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]He sounds anxious. Possibly 'trying to do the right thing' to overcompensate for not being close.

Not all ill/dying people want to hang out/care n share. Dumb idea unless Joe actually wants this.

Keep reminding him that neither family member is close to either of you and this would be an overstep. Tell him so cook some damn casseroles and take them over, rather than overcommit your/Pete's ass.[/quote]

Anxious people pleaser/over compensators often come up with these ideas that totally lack any kind of logic but are so caught up in the people pleasing aspect they can’t stop and think things through.

Joe is an adult and is capable of looking for support if and when he wants it. He can google, he can ask his doctor for support groups or other patients, he might already have a therapist. Your DH can’t save Joe or make Joe better and Joe never asked him to do so. Joe may already have supports but may not want to discuss them with your DH.

Find a new therapist bc yours should have already picked up on this behavior AND should have recommended your DH see a psychiatrist for meds for the anxiety. [/quote]

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