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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Defintiely don't correct the person with dementia. 
 We met an elder care specialtist on flight that said, do not correct them. My husbands brother always corrects his mother and it makes us so mad. He constantly is on her.
    We just go along with it “ have you seen Adrian”—- “ no mom but if we do we’ll tell him you’re looking for him” - sometimes we may say “Adrian isn’t here today”- that’s her late husband.
  If she complains/ we lean in and just acknowledge-“ I’m sorry your knee hurts/ want to go outside to feed the birds”— we distract from the negative moments when needed and go along with their reality.  5 minutes later, she doesn’t remember so if you corrected her that her husband passed, it would maybe make her sad a minute- but wouldn’t correct her thinking - she’d be back asking about him next day.
    Try to join in their reality or lack there of and be more happy upbeat and positive. Follow their thoughts. I feel like it’s easy to make her in that second think adrian is just not visable. [/quote]

So agree with this, yet our mom did throw us - and the staff - a curveball. She would occasionally ask "Has Dave been by yet?" Dave was our dad/her husband who predeceased her by a few years. Usually we could redirect, etc with no issues. But on a couple of occasions, she would get a little agitated and ask, "Tell me the truth - is he stepping out on me?" So this was so not like our mom or our dad, so it was hard not laugh, but we were able to refrain from doing so, then chat and chuckle about it later.

But yes, we would usually take the comment to redirect or sometimes follow the tangent and ask, for example, "when did you first meet X?" and go with it.[/quote]

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