Reply to Child-proofing the marriage

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Reply to "Child-proofing the marriage"

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[quote=Anonymous]Value dad as an equal parent - let him do things his way and be alone caring for the child from birth.

Value the relationship - your child is an addition to the family but not to your marriage. Keep a focus on the marriage relationship between the two of you - date nights, emotional, physical and sexual intimacy.

Talk things through and hear both sides. I completely agree with the cosleeping. Unless dad also really wants this and all three of you are together in the bed - don't do it. Kicking him out of the bed and bedroom is not a good plan.

Start talking about division of labor now - before baby comes. Make lists of what will need to get done, what will change  (e.g. does he currently play squash 3 nights a week) and what will be added.

Talk about baby raising issues - SAH, breastfeeding, cloth diapers...anything that involves extra work - where does he stand on these things. Has he thought of them?

Talk about things that are bothering you at a time when you aren't sleep deprived or mad. Those in the heat of the moment conversations never accomplish anything!

Take time to have fun. If life is starting to feel overwhelming or too stressful - you need to make a change to make it work. Be flexible.

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