Reply to College application lessons learned

Forum Index » College and University Discussion

Reply to "College application lessons learned "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My kid has a rough time in Covid but a silver lining has been this: if you let go of the idea of going to a "top" or competitive school, the process is actually easy and fairly stress-free (and you'll get a lot of merit money too). There are a ton of schools with high acceptance rates that are eager to have your kid.[/quote]

+1000[/quote]

Focus on helping your kid build  strengths for handling college, seizing opportunities, figuring out what they want to do with their life, and developing optimism and self-efficacy for their future rather than trying to optimize their admission into selective colleges. Every time they seem to be sucked into the college competition game, return them into thinking about what they want to do and why they want to do it.
Let the chips fall where they may with college admissions, but don't let your kid leave home into a massive financial and energy investment of college  without feeling like they have some sense of control, purpose and excitement over their future and some visions for what that might be. Not just pride or disappointment because they got/didn't get some brass ring of college admission.   It's very easy to just be good at school and think you need to just continue being good at school--it's harder to make that transition to building a life/career.[/quote]

It's not either/or. Most kids at selective colleges know what they want and are ready for careers.

It's just jealousy to pretend otherwise. 
[/quote]

I didn't say it was either/or--rather "let the chips fall where they may" but prioritize sense of purpose first.  I say this advice as my eldest kid who is now a senior at a highly selective college and, like many of his friends there, are feeling a lot of anxiety about life after school.  They have been successful so long at school, but they feel vaguely unmoved by future opportunities.  Some have good job prospects, some don't know yet.  But for both groups the vibe is more like "is this all there is?".  What I've learned for my younger is to start addressing purpose earlier and don't let them get sucked into competitive college process at the expense of it.  Kids only have so much time/energy and for high-achieving kids the culture is often pushing them just to get into the best college possible--some of which is very much out of their control.  And the evidence doesn't show that it makes a huge difference anyway--it's the kid not the school that makes the difference.[/quote]

I agree. Many kids choose a college and major based on “prestige” without any thought about what their life will be like after graduation. Most kids in this area have been on the achievement treadmill since pre-K just because that’s expected and what smart kids are supposed to do. Have your kids focus on doing what they Love and what makes them happy. The money will follow. Take chances and try new things while you’re young and unburdened by responsibility.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics