Reply to Problems with my four year old. I need a super nanny.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op again. So give me an example. If he hits me or kicks me do I give him a time out? (For us time out means going in your room) sometimes he doesn’t care ither times he hangs on the door. Feel like we’ve tried this so many times and the behavior didn’t change. What is something I do in the moment? [/quote]

Going to your room can be a tactic/consequence (Your attitude is unacceptable - go in your room until you’re ready to be around people again.), but it’s not a time out. A time out would be to Sit/stand in a specific (boring) spot and do nothing for X minutes (usually a minute for every year of age - in his case 4 minutes).

In the case of him hitting or kicking you, you should first of all follow through on whatever caused him to hit or kick you (taking away the cheese, getting dressed, etc). He doesn’t get his way because he was violent.

Then tell him how because he has hurt you, you are less inclined to do X (play game, take him on outing, snuggle up and watch TV, etc.) and he will be losing that privilege for X duration.  Give him a time out (as described above) to reflect on how hurting people won’t get him his way, will in fact cost him something, and that when he hurts people they won’t want to be around him and will certainly be less likely to do him favors.  While you’re his parent and will always love him and give him another chance, other people won’t.  How would he feel if other people hit and kicked him to get their way?

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