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[quote=Anonymous]As someone who has been involved with this for years, were it not for a sibling, it would be horrendous. Both my parents have dug in, are very frail, partially incontinent, can’t drive, etc. If my sibling was not there, they would have been forced out by social services. However my sibling is now drowning given the long, slow slide that both of them are in, and I simply cannot go out there even once per month (cross-country). They refused all the suggestions I made, or if one wanted to, the other dug in, usually my father, who is just not dealing with reality. The moment my mother suggests she wants out, I’m on a plane, picking her up to come to my home. Once she takes her social security with her, both my sibling and my father will be backed into a corner. The simplest solution is simply to downsize into a smaller place in the same community, where they can then use the substantial profits on their home to pay for help.

When it comes to stubbornness like this, you have to wait for a crisis. I’ve gone from hoping they will see the light, to hoping the crisis is a sudden death, not a nursing home. They could have planned better. My father thought he knew everything and would not listen to anyone. Clearly he didn’t.[/quote]

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