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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, Google “rejection sensitive dysphoria”. My DH is like this and I posted about him before. A PP recommended I look into it and every word was true for my situation with him. He doesn’t hate you - he hates himself and every negative encounter makes him feel rejected and then he lashes out. It’s extreme insecurity.

A similar disorder is covert/vulnerable narcissism.

What’s pushing me to leave is knowing that my daughters will think it’s normal for a man to treat them like this one day. I can’t have that. [/quote]
I don’t buy theories like this. That an abusive, narcissistic, likely mentally disordered grown man is lashing out constantly because of his great guilt or shame or awareness of his failures.
No. Long ago he (and possible a parent) convinced him that he can do not wrong and to lash out to anyone who dare question him or what he did or forgot to do. This maladaptive coping mechanism (anger outbursts) is deeply ingrained and misguided, but it is not from shame or hating himself. He hates you, who he can’t get to shut up and leave him alone. There may also be a huge dose of misogyny involved, especially if he calls you stupid, or contorts things you say and throws them back at you as lame, illogical insults. No matter, his goal is to get you to argue with him and then blame you for arguing, never is his goal to resolve a conflict. [/quote]

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