Reply to Help I am so overwhelmed with my 3 and 6-year-old boys.

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[quote=Anonymous]I have 4 boys who are now 10, 7, 4 and 1. Some of the behavior is inevitable- they are going to roughhouse a bit, make small messes, push each other around, etc. But they all also get along pretty well and are pretty calm. We generally don’t do any screens unless it’s like a special one off thing (8 hour drive, for example). So it isn’t an option for them - they don’t ask for it.

If there is some negative behavior going on, that boy gets to come hang out very close to me for a little while and help me with chores so I can keep an eye on them. They don’t seem to mind this and it gives me a chance to reinforce positive behavior (oh, thank you for helping wipe out the sink! It looks awesome now!) I tend to ask the older 2 to do heavy lifting type chores like digging up roots in the yard, hauling boxes, etc. pretty much every day.

So today for example my 10 year old has hauled laundry up and down the stairs several times for me to deal with, the 7 year old helped cook and clean up breakfast and now they are both reading. 4 year old is quietly entertaining himself with some little cars.

Bottom line is I think you need to set expectations, take away screens, and involve them in what you are doing. Find a related task to what you are doing and show them how to do it. Sometimes it will be fun and sometimes they will choose something else quiet instead. [/quote]

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