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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]DD was identified as gifted from an early age. She has always been a voracious reader and has a natural understanding of mathematical concepts. She is also an introvert which has made making connections with other students more difficult. One thing we have struggled with over the years is dealing with other students who ask for her assistance (answers) with schoolwork. It can be very frustrating for child who wants to form friendships but doesn’t want to feel as if they are being used. Anyway, a friend of DD asked for assistance with a project. DD ignored the request several times and then finally helped this friend. The friend ended up receiving an award for the project. I’m certain this would not have happened without assistance from DD as this other child has struggled in school. [b]The situation wouldn’t bother me so much if the friend had simply said “thank you” to my DD but there has been no acknowledgement to date.[/b]  Meanwhile, the mother has been boasting to me and others about her DD’s award. Should I let it go or at some point should I mention DD’s significant contribution to the project? I’ve told DD this is a lesson about not sharing work or ideas with others.[/quote]

Do you really think that after your DD "helped" this other child did not say thanks?
Or is it really that after this other child received the award that you think she should have said thank you AGAIN or publicly acknowledged that your DD "helped" so she could get the credit?

If it is the second, you are wrong.
If it is the first, well hopefully this other child will get some better manners, but really not your problem and not worth getting upset about.[/quote]

It’s definitely the first scenario. She repeatedly asked my DD for assistance to the point that DD didn’t know how to respond. I admit that my DD didn’t handle it well and should have said no. A simple, personal acknowledgment would have been more than enough. I always try to thank people who go out of their way to help me. [/quote]

So how exactly did this go down?  Here is what I am picturing...

Other child has to write a report or do a presentation about X.  Other child asks yours for help and your kid simply does not respond the first couple times.  The last time your kid finally responds and spends about half an hour making suggestions about content and how to organize, etc.  [I have a hard time imagining any child not saying "thanks" at the end of this exchange.]

End of story.  The award doesn't matter.  What the other mom said doesn't matter.  Either your kid was kind and helped someone out, she was not kind but did it because she felt pressure she did not have the tools to stand up to, or she actively engaged in cheating.  Which option do you prefer?[/quote]

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