Reply to Toddler Hates Getting Dressed

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So you have forced her into clothes, and the result is 5 minutes of crying?
 
The struggling for hours is when you don't force the clothes on her. This occurs when you "negotiate" by, eg, giving her options? Is that correct?

I think you need to force her into clothes every single time. Immediately, and not after you've run out of time. Give it a couple weeks to see if she adjusts. Boundaries are established in part by predictability. If she knows the routine is firm, maybe she'll get used to it.

The alternative, fighting with her for hours, sounds so much worse imo. She's not playing or have good interactions with you. It's a long string of negative interaction after another.

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PP is it that you have a particularly docile child? Or no appreciation of bodily autonomy? This suggestion is really appalling. You’re not training an army recruit, you’re navigating a relationship with a small child. Forcing someone bodily to do something is for car seats and moving kids out of traffic. Not for getting dressed. Geez. [/quote]

NP.  I actually picked a middle ground.  Essentially a variation on 1-2-3 Magic.  I would give my children choices including them dressing themselves and me dressing them.  I would give them 2 tries to choose themselves.  The third time I said, "since you didn't choose yourself, Daddy will dress you." and then I would dress them.  They learned that they had two chances to do it themselves or that the third time I would not ask and would do it.  They tried to run away before #3, but at that point, I was faster and had longer arms and could catch them.

It gave them two chances to choose bodily autonomy and make choices, and then had a consequence that did not allow wasting a lot of time.  I did not have the option to waste hours on this type of exercise.[/quote]

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