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[quote=Anonymous]OP, as you can tell different strategies work for different kids, so it's good to experiment which it sounds like you're doing.

In our case--we have an 11yo very picky eater who has been picky since the day we introduced solid foods when she was 6 months old.  We went through a long phase where dinner was a battle.  We also had a brief time when she was younger where she became very underweight and we had to address that. Now I would say we do "cater" though I don't really think of it that way.  I think of it as acknowledging that as an adult pp picky eater said, picky eating is not usually a choice and many picky eaters wish they weren't picky.  This is true for my kid who tries many foods and just doesn't like them.  We do encourage trying a single bite just to see (but don't force) and beyond that we don't worry about it.  She gets a separate dinner or an adapted dinner, like pasta the rest of us are having but with butter and no sauce.  We do not tie eating dinner to dessert.  We let her eat when she is hungry, and sometimes she eats a lot after school and less at dinner.  She eats a lot of fruit, and in general isn't eating junk food.  We don't comment on what she eats or doesn't eat.

This has worked out well for us and significantly decreased everyone's stress, she is growing fine and seems healthy and well-adjusted, so I don't worry.  In the last year or two her palate has expanded a bit.  My other kid is the polar opposite and eats almost anything.  Interestingly, for the most part these kids have tracked almost exactly the same for height and weight by age (except for the stretch when my picky kid had weight issues), which suggests to me that a lot of growth is genetics, not what they are eating.[/quote]

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