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[quote=Anonymous]I agree to think through all scenarios and in each case think about what you'd want if tables were turned and you were looking at the short end of the stick.  At some point I saw the separation agreement that DH signed with his ex many many years before we met and he got shellacked.  He was out of the country in the military and his lawyer clearly sucked.  I don't think OP mentioned that she was a SAHM, in fact, I think she is working.  As you mentioned, what happens if his income flags and your's goes up.  Can he turn the tables and ask you for child support if custody arrangements are close to 50-50? (As an example, when DH divorced, she had primary custody and he paid child support.  Based on circumstances, he eventually took custody and she only had visitation.  She paid no child support to DH, but expected him to send child support when my stepchild was visiting her for holidays or summer vacation.)

A PP mentioned money for private school, college, activities and summer camps.  Do you want language in there about who gets to make those decisions as well as who pays for them? I.e. I want private school for our DD, my DH doesn't.  If we got divorced and I had custody, would he be forced to pay tuition if I sent her to private school against her wishes?  These are things to think about.  I don't know how close you live to each other or what your work schedules are, but you need to think about this even in the context of everyday things.  If he decides to sign your DC up for travel soccer, do you have to make the drives all over the region or will he do it regardless of whose weekend it is?

I'd also think about emergency contact information, both in the separation agreement and then maybe directly with daycare or school.  I presume you'd both be the first emergency contacts.  Who is the backup - would he be comfortable if it was your mom or vice versa?  More dire, but determinations about legal guardian in the unlikely event that something happens to both of you.  Earlier agreement on who would raise your kids might be different now that you are separated.

Sorry you are going through this.[/quote]

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